Should frugal millennial guys be scared of Singapore women?

I happened to chance upon the blog post by Christopher on Why Singapore Women scare Frugal Millennial Guys and thought that I would share a few cents worth as a Singapore woman on this. Generally, I find it too stereotyping.
Here I classify "Millennial" based on Cambridge's definition of those born in the 1980s, 1990s, or early 2000s.


Define "frugality"

One issue that he raised was that millennial Singapore ladies seem to create the impression that they are spendthrift. They love to travel and instead of viewing travelling as a luxury, it's like a necessity. Lo and behold I may be just one of them! However, as the keyword said - it is just an impression. It does not mean my goal and hobby depend on travelling. In fact, I do view travelling as a 'luxury' in life and don't do luxury travel. Notice the difference? I don't think many Singapore women are suckers for luxury travel or view it as a necessity. Influencers only out to target 'naive Singapore women'? Nah! We can think for ourselves.

I supposed the group of millennial guys he has spoken to happened to be those who don't enjoy travelling. If you happened to be a guy who doesn't like travelling or who thinks travelling is not what you can afford to do, you can also simply find a homey girl who doesn't like travelling. Singaporean or not. You can save the money for something else... but what?

Being an 'indoor' person doesn't always mean one is really so-called frugal. Those who like to spend money on gaming and other small-ticket thrills could still snowball a large sum of money a year when multiplied by 365. I think the art in frugality is being prudent with how one spends his money.

With Singapore's (high) standard of living, one's idea of frugality may be quite different from another. You have your frugal ways, I have my frugal means. Define yours.

No buying branded goods is frugal? No travelling is frugal? No eating out is frugal? Cooking can be an expensive affair too - it depends on what you choose to cook.



Managing expectations

One good point that a commentor raised is the management of expectations. His expectation for his girlfriend was not to ask him to buy her branded handbags. Likewise, I believe there should be some expectation that he was asked from his girlfriend, since relationship is a two-way channel. Some reasonable expectations are healthy but nevertheless, keep it to a minimal in order not to sour the relationship.

If you are saving up for xxx reasons and therefore you cannot spend more than xxx budget this month, let her know. I am sure if she cares, she will understand. Don't need for lame excuses like 'my money is locked up somewhere'.

Please don't ever be generous on yourself and miserly on your girlfriend ok? 这种人我最看不起。

If you really die-die want to save money (and spend on only yourself) then don't date lor. Go sing BBFA rules! (I didn't know about this acronym until I googled it haha.)

Don't go dating with the mentality that Singapore women are all out to "ken" your money. If you don't care much on saving or boosting your ego, going dutch is fine for most Singapore millennial women too.


Remember to always manage your expectations first before you moderate others' expectations.



Be Ambitious

Be ambitious and passionate about something worthwhile in life.

One problem with the frugal millennials is that they only know how to save and aim for FIRE, then they have no idea what they want to do after FIRE.

Pause.


If you share your passion in life, you will naturally attract those who share your passion. 

Don't tell me your passion and life goal is about saving money ok?

Go listen to Steve's Job speech then tell me about it.

人往高处走,水往低处流。
So don't complain when you allow yourself to be stuck at the lower tree branch. When you are at the higher tree branches, you have no reason to be scared of anyone then.

---
A just-for-fun video below on Hypergamy I found from youtube.




Conclusion from the video: 
It's time to snap out of the wishful thinking that women of other nationalities won't follow the rule of hypergamy. 



***
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Comments

  1. Rainbow girl,

    I must come out of my "exile" to give you a high five!

    You go girl!


    But then again, do be gentle to my brethren who already have "holes-in-their-hearts"...

    You and I know why these "men" seek FIRE in the first place ;)

    Shh...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi SMOL,

      Nice to hear from you again. High five back man! What adventures did you go into "exile" for?

      I am more gentle than the trailblazing Gen X ladies already lah.
      Haha.

      Delete
    2. Rainbow girl,

      Just taking a break from blogging - it turned out to be a 2 month sabbatical!?

      Nothing special. Just chilling and smelling the flowers.

      I'll start blogging again next week, I hope ;)




      Delete
  2. Don't like travelling or don't like to spend money to travel?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think Chris' point was directed more at women who can't accept men, who are stingy both on themselves and on their mates.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't marry stingy man. His money not be yours. Who knows what happened to Last Will.

      Delete
    2. Hi Edwin,
      If stingy on both themselves and their mates, then it should be the women that's scared. Lol.


      Yeah, that's my Uncle8888! *thumbs up*

      Delete
  4. The choice of a partner is personal and subjective. You are certainly entitled to hold your personal views.

    I was just pointing out that Chris did not espouse a "spend money on yourself but save on your mate" mentality.

    As to uncle8888's comment, I am not sure I understand. In my humble view, in a healthy relationship, no one should ever feel entitled to their partner's money.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is that guy who feared future wife spends his money by transferring money out to place where his money is locked up. :-). :-)

      Delete

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