Reflections for year 2023

2023 is a year which I have relented to the inevitable dealing with adversities. Sending my mother in and out of hospital had become a norm. Being a healthcare professional, I thought I could handle it single-handedly well enough, not until the point when my mother ceased to be fit enough to attend dementia day care that I came to the conclusion that I needed a helper. However, things took a steep downhill turn before I could hired one (counted myself lucky that I did not commit to a hire). My mother passed away in June, it was a relief for me and probably a relief for her as well.

However, life is not meant to be smooth-riding. My mother did not leave behind a will, thus I have to apply for the Letters of Administration with the Court and as my sibling has mental disability, this led to some complexities which have yet to be resolved. Instead of hiring a lawyer, I decided to apply the LOA and MCA orders by myself through the Service Bureau. I am paying my time and convenience for it but that's fine as I have not decided to commence full-time work yet. I realized it's a pain in the a** to make requests from HDB. Unlike the CPF board, which readily provides assistance with clauses to put into the MCA order prayers for the purpose of monies inheritance, HDB could not provide the clauses to put into the MCA order prayers for the deputy to conduct sale of flat. After waiting for weeks, their reply is for me to consult my solicitor. I thought there would be standard clauses that HDB accepts for grant of rights, no? Thus, I have to search for and adapt clauses from the Power of Attorney instead and keep my fingers crossed that there's nothing missed out. Looks like I would have to send my Court order (when I received it) for the HDB to verify before I proceed with any resale application.

Investments and Financials

I got to write off my mother's share of Celsius's assets as I did not include that in her Schedule of Assets. Nothing is firmed up yet from Celsius's post bankruptcy restructuring except that creditors need to register for Coinbase account in order to claim the crypto in future. I shan't add on complication for the LOA. This Celsius saga was a "penny wise, pound foolish" lesson on my part. Period.

My SG equities portfolio's value was in the red with the two worst performers as HST (Lion Global Hang Seng TECH ETF) and US prime reit. Cannot reiterate to myself enough on greed and position sizing, and no averaging down on losers. Rest of my SG investments would be the usual boring FD, SSB and T-bills. Idea is "why take the risk for an uncertain 1-2% more in returns"?

As I am not versed in picking US equities, I used Endowus to buy the Dimensional Global Core Equity Fund which has one of the lowest management fees. It's still in the red (minus few hundreds) cos I didn't buy in at the best of time. My customized fund which ironically has 21% stake in the Dimensional Global Core Equity Fund was doing way better. It's other bulk is in Dimensional Emerging Markets Large Cap. Will look to add into it slowly.

I have closed my SAXO account and now just stick to Moomoo. My very leisurely and casually style of trading options has grown my account value quite marginally for the entire year. It's easy to blow up on a short option trade position so I need to exercise a lot of caution. My biggest mis-hit is not buying enough on the cheap and selling off AMD too early in this crazy rally. If the odds were good, my next best bet should be buying its call options periodically but I wasn't convicted enough (didn't do my homework well).

Personal Life

Home alone = Couch potato

With a new sport that I have picked up and playing every week, I feel that I have grown fitter. It's also nice to meet up often with my sports buddies and then just pig out and chill after each game. Through the sports I have got to meet more new people, new friends. I still missed my old friends but they have not much time for me, too busy with work and kids, so we could only catch up once in a blue moon. When we have different life circles and work environment it's also hard to find common topics to talk about.

My best friend got hitched 3 months ago. Really happy for her, and envious that she has found the true love of her life. I am quite skeptical of myself to be able to find one, cos I think I am too critical and self-centered. The older I grow, the more I feel that the kind of family life I want may not be what I want. Sacrificing freedom and committing to family life and kids... well, life is such that we cannot have the best of both worlds. In the worst case scenario, marrying the wrong spouse would mean putting up with nonsense for the rest of my life or a divorce.

Work wise... I hate work, as usual. I take it that I am exchanging my time for money and doing little contribution to society with my skills. When all the housing and legal stuff are settled, I will rethink my career path and try upskilling. I know I need to get out of my comfort zone in order to make progress but I am not very motivated.

I am simply enjoying the peace now while it lasts.

PS: Picking up the pen for my blog was literally difficult, as my laptop's keyboard has spoilt. Finally relented to getting a mini Bluetooth keyboard after failing all resuscitation methods. Also I am not entirely done with getting out of negativity I guess.

Thanks for reading!

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